oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
