I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize