What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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