why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
