If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
