my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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