I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
