guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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