Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
babies were throwing up all over the place
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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