oh god the rape fog is back!
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
