so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I cut my penus on the lid.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
wow bdsm is so cute
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
