I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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