My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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