Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Randomize
