I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
