I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
