I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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