Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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