Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
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