Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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