shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
