i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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