Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
