i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I think my moral compass just broke
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
