yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
