found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize