Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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