drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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