hell yes lets make some ravioli
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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