Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize