How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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