Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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