I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Someone came in the potted fern
40s are totally the cure
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
