She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
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