Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
