i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Randomize
