he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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