At least make sure they are 18
Why
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
