Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
