Say something about gay babies.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
