You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
