How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
