so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
