Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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