I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Randomize
