sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
