your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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