I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
