haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Randomize
