You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
